Stasis

I did it. I didn't wimp out. I phoned Date #15 and explained in a kind but concise way that I didn't think we had a future together, not even short-term, like in a day.

Sure, I could have left his call unanswered, which I've been known to do. But my latest resolution is to be the kind of woman who speaks up. What to say was the only question.

My girlfriend Eustacia suggested I make it about me, like in: I'm just not ready to get involved again.

"But that's not true," I told her.

"Why make him feel badly?" she replied.

Since we'd only gone out twice, I couldn't imagine him feeling that badly. Still, I didn't want to lie. So I asked my son, who was reading Road and Track on the couch, what he thought.

"I don't know," he answered.

"No, tell me what you'd say."

"I don't care. How about, 'no, I don't want to go out with you again?'"

"That's all?"

"Okay, no thank you. The girls I know, do it all the time."

"Do the boys feel badly?"

"Depends on the boy."

"You mean some boys don't?"

"Mom, let me read."

And so I did, then went into another room, called Date #15, and basically said no thank you to going out again.

I think he said, 'okay,' but maybe not, because suddenly there was this horrible static sound followed by a strange beeping.

"Hello? Hello? Are you there?" I shouted. Then I looked down at the phone and saw he was gone.

For a moment I felt terrible, and considered calling him back. But what would I have said except something lame like maybe we could get together as friends, which I really didn't want to do.

So instead I just sat there, felt badly a while longer and crossed my fingers that the next time the karma's finger wouldn't be pointing at me.